The Neurologic Initiative defines regulation as the ability to put time and thought between feeling and reaction. Sometimes in order to find that space in our minds, we need to create that space by physically distancing ourselves from the situation that is causing us distress.
Think of it like a boxing match between rounds when the fighters go to their separate corners. They use that time to catch their breath, clear their heads, and come up with a strategy for winning - or at least - surviving the next round.
Sometimes you can physically distance while other times you can only mentally distance yourself. But either way, it is hard to engage higher levels of thinking with the continuous presence of a stressor. Otherwise, our brain begins to get stuck in fight (or flight/freeze) mode and continuously looks for the threats, unable to see safety of help even when being offered.
***There is usually no need to reinvent the wheel when creating activities that teach or reinforce social and emotional learning. Many of these lessons have been in circulation for years. In fact, if a student is familiar with the activity, it provides even greater opportunity to focus on the SE skill being explored***
Drama
Move In or Move Away
Object: To consider the situations in which we would be well served to move away or create distance
Supplies: scenario cards
Process: Provide each student with a scenario card (It’s my birthday, I forgot my homework, I had my favorite lunch at school today, I have to go to the dentist, etc). Invite them to take a few moments and determine how they might mime this action.
After a few minutes to consider, invite students to create a circle. Explain, "Each of you will have the chance to perform in the middle of the circle. When you perform, please tell us what you are doing (should match what is on your card, and mime the actions that go along with this."
"Everyone on the outside of the circle should think about the scenario our performer is performing. If that same thing happened to you, would you want to get closer to other people or would you want to move away and spend some time alone? If you want to be with other people, move closer to, but not touching, the performer. If you want to find your own space, take a few steps away from our circle."
Invite the first person in and gently facilitate the steps of the process. Repeat until all students have had a chance to both perform and respond.
Discussion questions: Which scenarios did everyone or almost everyone move away from? How does moving away from the scenario help?
Music
Elbow room
Object: To explore how creating physical distance can be helpful
Supplies: any type of musical instrument, one for each student
Process: Begin by teaching students a simple rhythm or musical phrase to play on their instruments and practice until everyone is comfortable. Invite students to bring their instruments and stand closely so that they are nearly touching or touching. Once everyone is in a clump, ask them to play the phrase again. Are they able to do it? What if they take one step out? How far away from one another do they need to move to be able to successfully play the phrase?
Discussion questions: How did it feel to be so close together? What needed to happen in order for you to be successful? What are other times in life when it might be a good idea to move away from other people in order to feel successful?
Visual Arts
Design a sanctuary (created by Andrea Schuster)
Object: To consider what might be needed to create a safe space to move towards
Supplies: paper, pencils, optional colored pencils and markers
Process: Share a copy of Van Gogh’s Bedroom painting and explain that students will be
creating a drawing of their perfect bedroom, a space they can go to for comfort or relaxation. Students can use their current bedroom for inspiration and also add new elements that could make their room a safe space. For example, “my current bedroom is kind of small so I would make it bigger in the drawing in order to give myself more room. Maybe I would add photos of my family and friends on the wall to remind myself of all the people that care about me.”
Demonstrate drawing a three dimensional room. Allow students to first sketch their drawing in pencil. If time remains, allow students to add color with colored pencils or markers.
Discussion questions: What are the things in your room that make you feel safe? How does having a safe place to go help when you are feeling stressed?